PH
Nairobi – I will not dispute the following facts: some men are just good by the way and some women are just that good as well. They are good but most times you will find that they are the ones that end up with really bad people and have disastrous relationships/ marriages no matter what they do. They are the ones we always feel pity and bad for.
Then there are the other ones that are bad, which is the majority of us but they end up in good relationships. Is it a stroke of luck or genius in enabling them meet the right people to match their incompetence? Maybe it is but what do I know?
What I will tell you though is that there is no such relationship as perfect or any good relationship that has been smooth all the way. The couples just learnt to create a balance between both their strengths and weaknesses.
What some people do is assume that if they got a turn with a certain partner that their lives would be better or perfect. The grass is always greener as long as you are allowed to visit once in a while and not actually tend it. You might get your wish but not even be able to handle them. So you look at your friend’s husband or your friend’s wife and you think to yourself, ‘How amazing would my life have been if I had just met them first?’
You probably would have turned them away because they had bad or poor habits. You probably would have overlooked them because they weren’t as stylish or classy as you prefer. You forget that they have become that after your friend gave them a chance.
And that is what all relationships and partners need-a good chance. If you are not willing to be open minded enough or willing to overlook some things on your list, then that might be the reason you keep hitting on bad rocks. None of your partners have that appreciation of saying, ‘If not for you, I would not have become this better version of myself.’ You want the better without the work and that makes you easier to walk away from. There is nothing more you are adding to that person’s life, so they go look for it with other people.
Good relationships have their problems. They were either experienced when the couple first met and dealt with. Or they are a constant that the couples have learnt to manage because they are too important to each other to walk away from.
So you are still mooning about how much greener your grass would have been with a particular person but let me ask you, ‘How much work have you put in at the moment for in whatever situation you currently are in?’
If none, then that is why you have nothing good to show.
